My Problem, My Solution

It has been more than four and half years, that I had came across this beautiful article when I was going through the most tough phase. Yeah, it was really hard, rough phase where you gave your 100% and still things around you have not took any single step further as per your plans. It is that point where you don't have any idea whether to hold on and give one more try or should move on and try something else. 

Yes, I am talking about the situation where your only dream at the moment is to pursue Post-Graduation (M.Tech/MS/PhD) at IIT's and IISc but not able to get in somehow. During that time, I came across this article by Mr. Manish (M.Tech from IIT-K and PhD from USA), where he had tried to motivate many students at a given single instant through his motivational writing. 

After reading his article, some kind of energy was pumped into me and helped me to get up on my dreams once again and started working again from the scratch. I hope this will also help you to work on your dreams and remember "Never Give-Up". If you don't do it for yourself, no one else is going to do it for you.  Its necessary to taste the "Failure" in order to understand "Success" in real terms.        

The original Article by Mr. Manish is as follows,

GATECounsellor » campus » My Problem, My Solution

My Problem, My Solution

By manish@gcblog | June 27, 2013 | campus, GATE, gate preparation

Contributed by: manish@gcblog on June 27, 2013.

In the following article, I have tried to express my views regarding the topic given above. Before proceeding with the article, I would like to let you know that I am a person from your “young” generation. I am exactly aware of the condition(s) you are through. I did my B.Tech. from Aligarh Muslim University in the year 2009. Just after finishing my undergraduate course, I planned to pursue M.Tech. from IIT Kanpur. I am continuing my studies as a PhD student in the United States. I think these details are enough to begin the article now.

So, if you look at the topic “My problem, My solution”, the influencing and connecting word is “My”. In particular, it does not asks for “My problem, and advices/solutions by other persons”. Because, if you are going to ask anybody about your problem, you will get a whole list of things you can do. I am very well aware of how our (Indian) society works. The only thing you can get free is “Advice”. And, in those conversations, we forget to ask someone, who is constantly ignored by us. He/she is nothing other than someone reflected in the word “Me”, i.e. your soul!

Eventually, we get so many advices that we feel confused and frustrated which are enough to leave the things as they are. We come back and realize that the problems are still there. Instead of asking that innerself, we try to skip the problem. We wonder, how to find a “shortcut” button, which can ease our pain.

I love to remain in contact with my juniors. The most common situation faced by them is given below (even this scenario was at my side, when I was a kid who was enjoying his life perfectly with a group of friends in his B.Tech. program ).

(i) The story starts in the first year of B.Tech. with a feeling “I have enough time to catch up for GATE/PSUs”, “I wasn’t selected in IITJEE, but see me this time dude, I will rock, IITs will be mine.”

(ii) Slowly, we realize that we can score reasonably well in midsem/final exams without spending much time in books/lectures. We keep rewarding ourselves by minor achievements (like scoring an “A” grade in a tough subject etc.). Time passes by, and we try to look at the eligibility criterias for GATE and PSU exams, whether they allow third year and fourth students.

So, we decide let’s do one thing: “I will see what happens in third year result. Accordingly, I will prepare in my fourth year (with the same rocking feeling)”. How about doing some GATE coaching?

(iii) As soon as the results of those third year eligible exams are out, we realize that the exam was a bit tough and we need to spend more time on books. 

The discussion consists of phrases like:

“Everything was from book. Damn it! That formula slipped from my mind. Believe me, the question just needed that stupid formula”

“I have more than a year in my hand, I will break the rules in fourth year. See how I speeds up “

“Let’s make some plans, let’s strategize everything, especially which subject to study first?”

(iv) And, the person gets in his fourth year. The scenario is:

More labs to attend. Which makes it reasonable to say “Less time to spend on books”

Placements are not good. Trying to search for off-campus type options

Still thinking, whether try companies like TCS, Infosys or aim for core companies like Siemens etc.

Download placement papers from internet. Let’s take the placement first. At least I should have something as a “backup” (no discussion about competition like GATE, my mind is on “I will think about it LATER mode”)

My friends are getting placed. How should I land one job?

(v) Finally, we get placed in some company. And, we always have one good phrase from our company’s profile/history, like “My company has largest number of employees”, “My company was first in introducing ______ instrument in India”

Time goes by. Almost every night becomes a reason for long-ending parties. We do not get time to think more about our “needs”. The needs that will feed our mind in few years from now.

The story ends, we still don’t understand what we were aiming for? Everything gets practical, it’s hard to save money, we keep switching the companies. Because, we forgot to turn-on the switch that may have reflected the solutions to our problems, at the right time. Friends keep posting their pics/news about their new “highly paid” or any other “attracting” job/update. At that time, we try to think, we should have done something better.

The funny thing is that we do not forget every little decision that could have changed our lives. Our mistakes comes in front of us, motivating us to wipe off all those things. Friends keep departing, a group of ten is scattered into a group of two or three.

Believe me, the scenario I have discussed above is very common in our generation. I do not oppose the “getting placed” type attitude. Neither I believe that getting placements is a trivial thing. The thing I will be stressing in this article relates with the person that was left behind.

If you are in your B.Tech. program and you believe that there are still many things you need to prove, following are the suggestions from my side.

1. Start thinking from the very basic: Keeping in mind: you reap what you sow

2. Blame yourself, even if it is obvious that you are not wrong: Now is not the right time to prove anything. Focus on your work irrespective of what others are doing, or what others are achieving.

Be straightforward, if you’re wrong accept it. Don’t live in any imaginary world, neither try to put reasons in front of everyone. Try to place the “real”reasons in front of you. So, if you were not able to qualify IIT-JEE, accept it. Accept that there were some mistakes. Don’t tell anybody, rather save it at

the very back side of your mind. And, don’t forget that you need to work on these mistakes, once you become a part of new battle.

I am not really a big fan of Facebook. Probably because, it tells you more about the life of others, than giving an insight to “yourself”. That in my way, keeps you away from the real scenario/perspective.

Just a thought: why there aren’t any “dislike” options on Facebook? May be because, we try to hide the “dislike” things from ourselves, we try to escape from our inner-self. We are happy with our good side and don’t want to discuss our dark side. And, guess what? We are interested in other’s life more

than we know our likes and dislikes. The day, they will try to incorporate this feature, people will find it difficult to make even few hundreds of friends on Facebook. That’s just my way of looking at it and according to me, it’s new name will be Fight-book

I may be wrong, but some of the facts pushes me to think in this manner. We know everyone more than we know our “inner-self”.

I was attending a spiritual talk at IIT Kanpur in 2010. The speaker asked: “List five strengths and five weaknesses about yourselves”. Everyone started counting in their mind. Most of us were able to figure out some of our strengths. But, almost everyone was blank at their weaknesses.

The speaker smiled and said: “What if I ask you to write weaknesses of your friend/companion/colleagues?” In that case we will provide her a complete word document, maintained in a nice font and color. The document will provide several problems in our friends which they need to work on. This observation was enough to prove that we know others more than we know ourselves.

That’s true. We know ourselves. But, we don’t!

I was harshly distressed by a suicide committed by a highly talented IIM girl. She had approximately 700 friends on Facebook, still the conditions made it worst. 

Understand the problem/situation. Be practical, none of your friend is going to give you a part of his salary each month. Everything looks good at the beginning, things fade out with time. And at last, we regret the things we did, hiding the things we could have done to live this place better.

In short, train your mind for solving your own problems. Don’t expect anything from others. Neither do much for them. Like I said it once:

“When you do MORE than what other deserves,

AUTOMATICALLY you expect MORE than what you deserve.”

This doesn’t mean to get secluded and live like a monk. But, find time to spend with your inner-self

to understand your actual needs. Remember, that’s your life, you have to answer your inner-self

one day. If not today, then tomorrow!

3. Close every door: Realize your inner potential. Forgetting everything, ask yourself: What do you want? Where are you heading to? How can you better utilize this time?

Recently, when I was talking to one of a B.Tech. final year student, she said: “Hey, I think I am late. I am in final year, we have about 8 months left for GATE. Now GATE is merged with PSUs, it’s tough to crack. Also, placements will start in some time etc. etc. (and she had a list of these type of reasons)”.

I said, if I were you, I would have started preparing for the exam from this instant. Be true to yourself: “You’ve done it. You have to face it.” Just use your time efficiently.

In future, you will be glad to see how better you have utilized your time. According to my understanding “Success is making BEST out of your POTENTIAL“. And, to me: success is a synonym of satisfaction. 

Along the similar lines, I was talking to a sophomore who was confused in selecting his career path (from M.Tech., MBA, or placements). As our conversation proceeded, I realized that the problem arises when we compare everything in terms of “Money Factor”. Don’t try to chase something because it will be a step to improve your financial status (unless your family needs it badly!). Neither try to do something because it’s easy to achieve. Instead, ask yourself what kind of life you want to live?

Be true to yourself and give yourself some time to compare these three lives. Like in M.Tech., you will be spending much time with books. You will be on the technical side. However, in MBA you will be on the management side. Now, you have to ask yourself about the things you like most. I do not underestimate any of these things. But, it’s really embarrassing when you are forced to do the something that you don’t like (like a robot).

4. Keep exploring yourself until you get the solution: It’s in there, give yourself some time to figure out what is best for you. The more you explore yourself, the better you will understand your problem. 

And in case you haven’t got what you demanded, take a chill pill. You will get what you deserve, just keep pushing the cart. Adjust yourself to the surroundings. And, when you think you’re good to move ahead, start new iterations by considering that point as the starting point.

5. Try to keep your mouth shut and listen: Be succinct in words. Don’t put infinite reasons of why you were not able to achieve your goals. No one wants to know that. Even if they try to, they are just verbose speakers. You will see them enjoying their life after few hours. So, talk to yourself and

prioritize everything accordingly.

6. Make it low, make it slow: Don’t take shortcuts. If you cannot work on your goal right now, you won’t be able to achieve it tomorrow. The shortcuts are bad. They may give you a temporary satisfaction. But, at the end you will realize that you have skipped many important things.

Consistency is an important thing to learn. Don’t try to run too fast that you fall off and get injured. It’s better to study 2 hours daily for five days rather than studying for 10 hours continuously. In this manner you will understand the sacrifices you need to do to achieve your dream. 

7. Think how the perspective is from the top of the earth: After few years from now, the problems you have faced will look trivial. Think from a broader perspective. Don’t compare your life with your friends, everybody is different. And, everyone has different physical and mental capabilities.

Lastly, if after pushing it too hard, you’re not able to move it. Think about your past achievements, think about a non deserving candidate getting paid more than you thought . If they can survive, you are of course better than them.

In this article, I have tried to share my experiences. I did not had any plans to prove that any other philosophy is wrong. My whole intention was to make you realize that: within you lies the solution of equations you are trying to solve.

Control your mind, it’s yours. No one has the right to occupy even a ΔV volume of it.

Take your time and understand your priorities. Believe me you will be better than you ever thought you could be.

I have been through those times. I can imagine the life you are through. Training your mind is tough, the best way to achieve this is by exploring yourself through meditation. Get in touch with me, if you want to discuss more about it. You are also welcome to share any of your personal troubles. I will keep the confidentiality of your details. Even if GATECounsellor places your question somewhere, you will be kept anonymous.

Thanks for reading the article. Please feel free to comment* below.

Have a wonderful life ahead.

Your

senior.

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To know what TO DO in your life is as much important as to know what NOT TO DO in your life.

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*Disclaimer: Although we will try our best to share our experiences. I am (or GATECounsellor is) not responsible for the future actions you may take based upon the article, comment or the advice.

This article is really worth of your time. 

Thanks for reading it patiently and do share this article among your friends. Please feel free to comment below. 

All the best for the GATE Preparations.